These Crazy Truck Accessories Drive Us Nuts

off road truck accessories illustration by ryan olbrysh2500 1588000886.jpgcrop1.00xw1.00xh00resize1200

Ryan OlbryshCar and Driver

What you drive says a lot. What you do to what you drive says even more. Take washing your truck, as an example. What’s it cost? A few bucks each time, maybe less if you’ve opted for a monthly car shampoo subscription service. You do it because it makes your ride look nice if only for a few thousand feet, and it’s important to keep grime off parts that would otherwise gunk up, rust, and later fall apart. Washing is smart. But what good is that sticker of Calvin taking a leak?

The allure of affixing trinkets to bumpers and glass goes back to the car’s earliest days, back when headlights were optional. No one was wrapping their pressurized acetylene tanks with Mossy Oak camouflage covers in the 19th century, but personalization quickly became common. Today, no single square inch of the car is safe from a Next Top AutoZone Model makeover. There are a lot of accessories. Our list includes 18-inch lift kits, a pair of plastic, um, accoutrements to hang from the hitch, and even some stuff we actually like.

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Retrofit Headlights

Plug-N-Play BI-LED Headlights
theretrofitsource.com

$1,350.00

Updating important equipment like headlights can easily go wrong. The Retrofit Source makes things easily go right. Since 2005, TRS has been repairing used or recycled headlight housings, loading them with lighting upgrades like projector lamps or LED lights, and selling them as a complete unit. If you have an older truck with halogen bulbs, TRS is a trusted vendor for upgrades that promise to brighten your world. 

Bullet Hole 3M Vinyl Stickers

Decals by Haley
amazon.com

Ever watched one of those sweet car chase and shootout scenes in a movie that ends with bullet holes decorating the trunk of the escaping hero’s Aston Martin? Do you wish you too could have a trunk pocked with bullet holes? Thanks to this 24-pack of vinyl stickers, you can. And with none of the terror. These stickers are only $7, nearly a third of what a box of 9-mm rounds cost and, again, no terror. 

Fastback Truck Cap

MICHIGAN VEHICLE SOLUTIONS
mivehiclesolutions.com

$3,495.00

Leave it to a group of our fellow Michiganders to reinvent the truck cap. The fiberglass topper not only adds 1980s notchback Mustang style, but also a third brake light and an optional Bluetooth speaker system. The folks at Michigan Vehicle Solutions wouldn’t confirm or deny said speakers exclusively play Bob Seger. Gas struts lift the louvered portion of the cap and help retain some of the truck bed’s functionality. This much fiberglass is sure to add at least a couple hundred pounds, but the company claims its triangular shape helps improve aerodynamics and fuel mileage on the highway. The Aero X is also available on Ram 1500 and Ford F-150 Raptor and available in any color paint to match.

55-Inch LED Light Bar

AUTOSAVER88
amazon.com

$108.99

When the halogen headlight replaced kerosene and acetylene tanks in 1910, nighttime was forever changed. More than 100 years later, headlights still haven’t reached a good combination of illumination and safety, but affordable LED light bars on Amazon are here to solve at least one part of the problem. This 180-LED bar has three modes: subversive spot, flood, and high-density spread. They promise to “make dark night become daytime.” Turn the top of any vehicle into a lighthouse. 

2-Inch Wheel Spacers

Supreme Suspensions
amazon.com

$118.95

Adding aftermarket wheels to a lifted truck isn’t as easy as pinning lug nuts and swapping tires. There’s science behind getting everything to fit properly while also ensuring nothing rubs during full-lock turning maneuvers around large rocks or abandoned shopping carts. Wheel spacers are a popular option for people who want to move the wheel farther from the hub. They’re also responsible for the term “tire poke,” which is when the wheels poke ridiculously far out of their wells. The best way to ensure proper fit is to buy wheels with the correct offset and spacing, but these are a popular and cheap alternative.

10-Inch Outlet Exhaust Tip

ROLLING BIG POWER
amazon.com

$139.99

This is the perfect accessory for someone conscious about the size of their pipe. This polished stainless-steel exhaust tip measures four inches at the inlet, and an insane 10 inches at the other end. Rolling Big Power offers a catalog of big aftermarket truck parts, and this laser-cut tip does not disappoint. An integrated exhaust clamp makes installation as easy as lifting it up to the end of your exhaust, but tacking it on with a welding torch is suggested. 

Bulls Balls Truck Nuts

BULLS BALLS
bullsballs.com

$39.95

Though its origins are somewhat controversial, Bulls Balls Truck Nuts have been around for as long as people have hung plastic testicles from their rear bumper. There’s no real use for these beyond drawing attention and giggles from fellow commuters, or to offend the humorless, but it takes grit (and about $30) to drive around with these under the license plate. There are two generations available in several colors and a handful of patterns. If you’re going to show the world some nuts, this is the safest way to do it. 

Bully Dog Performance Tuner

Bully Dog
amazon.com

$399.00

The Bully Dog Performance Tuner might be the perfect fit for someone feeling hesitant about installing performance-enhancing parts on their new truck  The device, which attaches to the OBDII port of any vehicle, displays live data from the computer. Wi-Fi capabilities allow it to download and store engine management tunes or update trouble codes for new vehicles. Selling the truck or just want to return it to factory settings? No worries, the Bully Dog Performance Tuner also stores factory settings, making restoring parameters back to their original values as easy as pressing a few buttons. 

Rock Lights

MICTUNING
amazon.com

$89.99

There’s no shortage of ways to add lights to your ride. These tiny LED weatherproof pods glue or fasten inside the wheel to help illuminate parts and the terrain underneath. These can be especially useful when something breaks and someone forgot to check the batteries in the flashlight. This kit, from MICTUNING, includes a remote to change the colors to meet your personal needs. These lights will work on ATVs, boats, cars, motorcycles, and anything else with a 12-volt power source. 

Vertical Lamborghini Doors Kit

Vertical Doors inc.
ebay.com

$899.00

It’s the closest your old Dodge Ram will ever be to a Lamborghini Countach, but don’t let that stop you. Vertical Doors, located in Southern California, builds kits for everything from pickups to the Chevrolet Corvette, Ford Mustang, and even the Lamborghini Gallardo and Huracán. Why would anyone do this? The argument has long been about parking in tight spaces, and how the doors open up instead of out at other cars, but to be completely honest, it really comes down to just wanting your truck to look crazy.

18-Inch Lift Kit

kkfabrication.com

$10,000.00

This modification might be the shepherd’s pie of suspension modifications, but the axle height is still dependent on wheel and tire size. Long-travel control arms and heavy-duty shock clamps and trailing arms help the towering shock absorbers do their job. It transforms your pickup into a monster truck on street tires. But at $10,000, we hope there’s at least a plastic ladder included to ease the climb. 

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